Jeff
Jeff grew up in the Maritimes and is currently a PhD student at UNB. He is married and has a lovely daughter.
Usually, experiencing the Gospel involves facing some things about ourselves that we would rather ignore, and then taking the courage to act on what God is telling us. Because Jeff listened about something he would rather rationalize away, he experienced the Gospel.
I have been a CHRISTIAN for about 2 years. I use capital letters simply to distinguish what I was before a christian. Although I was baptized as a baby and went to Sunday school and church every week (well almost every week...ok fine at least once a month) I did not have the faintest idea what "being a CHRISTIAN" meant. I am still learning, but I want to share with you something that happened to me recently.
We all know that somewhere in the Bible it says "Thou shalt not steal". Even if you have never read the Bible, you likely learned from either your parents or at least in elementary school that you simply should not take something that belongs to someone else. I don't know about you, but I always thought that just meant "serious stealing" like robbing a bank or shop lifting. In a sense I had made arbitrary categories or levels of stealing so that I could assure myself I was not a "stealer". But in fact that is just what I am.
Before coming back to school I worked in a consulting firm. When I left I took some equipment with me (an old camera, a tape measure, a ruler, etc). These were not big ticket items nor were they missed by my former employer. I had them for four years and no one ever asked me for them. So that must mean they were mine right? Well, that was what I thought. Whenever I used the equipment a slight sense of guilt would creep in, but I was good at rationalizing away any uneasy feeling. That got more difficult to do this summer.
Through some readings I had been doing and some conversations I had with Christian friends I began to ask God for direction in my life. I was thinking God would direct along the lines of career path and help with my studies. But, the thoughts that came to my head after this were instead focused on treating my wife with more respect and teaching my daughter about God. One thought that kept recurring over a 3-4 month period was that I should return the equipment to my former employer.
At first I was once again able to rationalize that thought away. But it would always come back stronger than ever. One morning I woke up at 4am thinking about it and I finally admitted that I had in fact stolen the equipment. So I gathered it up in a box and sent it in the mail. I then emailed my former boss and explained what I had done and that he could expect a package in the mail the following week.
The interesting thing is that I felt such a sense of relief of finally doing the right thing. I truly believe that this experience was actually a result of God directing my life. When that voice inside of me speaks next time I am not going to ignore it. I must conclude by admitting that as I was writing this note that voice reminded me that there are still 3 other items I have not returned. Guess what I am going to do now?